A Word That Attracts People

Gang, in my mother's opinion, is a horrible word. A poor choice.

I've tried to explain that it doesn't mean what she thinks it means, and it's more about running in a pack in this new, albeit scary economy, and a "feel good" kind of gangs connotation, yet despite whatever I say or how I say it all of my lame-ass attempts at clarification are, as usual, falling on the deaf ears attached to the ever inquiring head of my harshest critic, and most loyal, loving stalker.

She made it clear that if I want people like her to visit my blahhg, it needs to not have the word "gangs" in its title. She suggested that I change the name, and brightly added that not many people are reading it, so it should be easy to do, and start fresh. She was inspired by a news bit she'd just heard on WGN about a blahhg in Roger's Park, and had called to hold her cell phone to the radio speaker so I could hear the last few closing comments.

"You're kind of doing that for Wicker Park, aren't you? With your newsletter?"

"Well, sort of," I replied. "Not totally."

We segued into another pressing topic, sparked by the son of someone whom she just met yesterday, a reportedly cute, Jewish guy with a shared interest in comedy whom was in town performing at a comedy club last night while I was in the waiting room of a tattoo parlor supporting a newly inked pal. My mother told me that she would have sent him a picture of me, but that she didn't have any good ones on hand.

My insistence that I've met someone cool recently, and that I'm not in the market to meet others also fell on deaf ears, as she went on to tell me all about this guy. When I suggested sending him to my blog she refused, on account of the word gangs, and its questionable content- despite the fact I checked out this guy's radio show, and he's as crude as Howard Stern.

"And, why is that flag upside down? she asked, referencing a story she heard on her main news source of WGN about a priest whom got in trouble for hanging an upside down American flag.

I didn't do anything to doctor the GONE blog's photo. It looked exactly like that when the flag hung near the ceiling of Grand Central Station in NYC when I was there for a trade show back in November on Election Day, when I actually had a job, one that depressed me mentally but fed me physically, though I guess none of that matters anymore. The flag photo being from election week, and correlating it to Obama, and the new economy is something that is perhaps meaningful to me only, and confuses others. I'm in a gang of one these days, which is under attack by my mother.

It's only the afternoon, but I feel like I need a drink. And, according to her, a better word. "You need a new word. A word that attracts people. Gangs do not attract people."